Saturday, January 25, 2014

Adios, Wanker

I once had a friend who had an aunt named Priscilla. They called her Prissy. I saw her all the time and, in greeting, I would say, "Hi. How are you?" There was no way I was going to say, "Hi, Prissy."

That same friend's father was called Hy. I always felt ridiculous saying, "Hi, Hy." I tried "Hey, Hi," but that obviously didn't work either. "Hello, Hi," felt very stiff and stilted. I thought of addressing him by his proper name, but I was a teenager still learning reproductive anatomy; I broke into snorts of laughter at the idea of saying, "Hi Hyman." Finally, I decided to always greet him with, "How ya' doin', Hy?"

TODAY'S SUNRISE. (CLICK TO BE AWED.)

The bartender at the restaurant Sandpiper (where our friend Darren is the chef) is named Juan Carlos (like the King of Spain). Juan Carlos is a very formal name and his friends and family don't use it. The typical nickname for Juan Carlos is "Juanca," and that's how this Juan Carlos has always been known.

Juanca's 10-year-old cousin was in the neighborhood one afternoon with his parents. They stopped in to say hello. As they exited the crowded restaurant, the little boy called back, "Adios, Juanca!" The British patrons were appalled. One "prissy" woman was heard to mutter, "That ill-mannered little boy just called out, "Good-bye, Wanker!"

And that's why everyone now calls him "Juan Carlos."

MUCH MORE ARTFUL THAN THIS POST.

Passing by Sandpiper this morning, I snapped the below photo specifically for this story. Ana, one of the owners, came running outside and struck a pose for me. I snapped that photo, too, but I'll save it for another time. I think she'd prefer that when she finds out this one's about the "Juanca" that works behind the bar.

NO WANKERS HERE...

32 comments:

  1. LOL! I never know initially where you are going to go Mitch! Amazing 'what's in a name', eh?

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    1. Jim:
      Most of the time, I don't know where I'm going either.

      Delete
  2. It's all in the intonation and subtle (not so much) accent, me thinks!

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    1. Ron:
      In my accent, I wouldn't have thought twice about the name Juanca. But say it like your from parts of Great Britain (or even parts of NEW England), it's a different matter.

      Delete
  3. I was wondering how you would pronounce Juanca, but not for long. A workmate called Ho caused me similar greeting problems.

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    1. Andrew:
      Hi Ho, Hi Ho... And that's not the worst of it. Poor guy!

      Delete
  4. How about, "Hi, man." Nope...

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    1. Michelle:
      OK, I guess I haven't out-grown those snorts of laughter.

      Delete
  5. People are quite friendly here and often say "Hola" or "Buenos Dias" when you pass them on the street. I try to be respectful, but have a feeling it comes out "good god!"

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    1. Sharon:
      That's hilarious. It wouldn't have crossed my mind. ¡Buenos Dios (o Dios Mío!)!

      Delete
  6. Thanks for making me laugh today. I wonder what everyone would call the King if he showed up.

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    1. Stephen:
      I'm pretty sure they'd call him Your Majesty... (sorry; I couldn't help myself)

      Delete
  7. At least his nickname isn't Juancaca? Yes, I did have to go there...my inner child is being a brat today. =)

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    1. Jacquelineand....
      Great minds think alike. I've actually been playing around with a "caca" post lately. Watch this space!

      Delete
  8. I went to medical school with two men; they are Jeffrey Nurse and (worse) Thomas Doctor. Can you imagine? I wouldn't have gone into medicine with last names like that.

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    1. Spo:
      Apparently, Dr. Doctor and Nurse Nurse are not uncommon. I've seen it many times. When I worked in medical illustration, we also had one of each on staff. But my favorite was the head of Urology, Dr. Waterhouse. In Washington, D.C., we used to regularly pass a podiatrist's office. He was Dr. Corn. Predetermination?

      Delete
  9. Parents should think about things like this when naming their children.
    My own name was sometimes a source of acute embarrassment as a teenager. The smartypants would call out "hi Jean" or "it's you Jean" because they knew it wasn't cool and all kids should have a name that's cool, not embarrassing.

    Consequently I feel for the little girl whose mother named her "Chlamidya". She thought it sounded nice and didn't know what it meant! My friend's daughter encountered the poor child while practising family law and tactfully pointed out the problem to the mother. Sadly she decided to stick with it!

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    1. Jean:
      I had never even thought about the "Hi, Jean" problem... and I usually play with names in my head all the time. But I can proudly say, I never used them against kids, always understanding how those things could stick forever. I agree with you that some parents give no thought to the impact of certain names. In addition, there are parents who think they're clever and give their kids names that will haunt them all their loves. I worked with a man whose name was Frank N. Stein. His Hollywood parents thought it was funny. I thought it was cruel.

      Delete
  10. I forgot to add : lovely photos.
    We have grey skies and poring rain here, pretty standard for late January, so I am extremely jealous of your sunshine.
    Still, at least it's not falling as snow. Yet.

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    1. Jean:
      Sorry about your weather. I was going to take pictures of this morning's sunrise, but it wasn't as dramatic as yesterday's. Not a cloud in the sky. And I think it may be summer again.

      Delete
  11. Some years ago I knew a family whose surname was Butter. They had a son and called him Roland.
    Another howler was a lady called Mrs Lily Pond. When her husband died she remarried and became Mrs Lily Pool.
    Working with the general public has its moments of light relief..........!

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    1. Jean:
      Poor Roland! Do you suppose Lily chose her husbands base on their last names? I wonder if she lives in town or if she's of the valley...

      Delete
  12. I love how your clever titles really set me to wondering what on earth THIS one is going to be about :) Great story :)

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  13. First heard the term wanker from a British friend that worked with me at Camp Lymelight in 1977. I always was amused by the term......

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    1. Carole:
      Some words are just perfect... (Completely forgot about Camp Lymelight!)

      Delete
  14. You live in Paradise such beautiful photos.

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    1. Laurent:
      It's a bit too developed for the Garden of Eden, but it's a wonderful spot (and the Garden of Eden would be lacking all the modern conveniences).

      Delete
  15. I guess we all have issues with words...
    There's a new employee at work,
    he's from Asia and his name sounds exactly like a slang term used in Quebecois
    for the penis.
    So I never say his name.
    If I were him, I'd change my name.
    I just hope he's not gay,
    or maybe this could work in his favor!?!...

    BTW, the word verification for that comment I left on another posting
    had "cunt" in it.
    I'm just saying...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TICKLEBEAR:
      I often wonder about that "random" word-verification. I've had some odd coincidences myself. I wonder if your co-worker knows about the awkwardness of his name. I knew a couple who named their two sons Willy and Pete. I wondered what they were thinking... if anything. (At least the father's name was NOT Dick.)

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  16. Oh lordy that made my evening. Juanca - hee hee (Yeah I know, I'm acting like a school girl)

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    1. Nubian:
      Oh, good! We're heading over there for dinner in about a half hour. I'll be sure to give Wanker... I mean Juanca... your regards.

      Delete

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