Monday, October 5, 2015

Loosening A Jar From The Nose Of A Bear

The Kid Brother is focused, which is another way of saying The Kid Brother is obsessive-compulsive and has a very difficult time changing his routine.

"Whadda YOU want?" he blurted when I phoned at 6:25. "I take my shower at 6:30!"

"You're late!" he snaps, when I connect on Skype at 11:01 instead of 11:00. 

If I connect at 10:59, he mutters, "You're early!"

Sundays during spring/summer, he plays softball in Central Park. So he visits my mother Saturdays and they have lunch together.

Saturdays during fall/winter, he bowls in a league. So he visits my mother Sundays and they have lunch together.

Three mornings per week he drops off his laundry at a nearby fluff-and-fold. They originally told him it would be ready by 4. So that's when he picks it up. Not 4:15. Not 5. Four o'clock.

(Click the images; they get bigger.)

MUSY, AS OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE AS HIS UNCLE.
HERE HE IMPATIENTLY AWAITS HIS AFTER-LUNCH TREAT. "IT'S 3:30!"

San Geraldo and I catered an 80th birthday bash for The Dowager Duchess (eight years ago). We included The Kid Brother as our co-host. The evening before, he told me he couldn't come to the party because, "I got softball Sunday, ya know!"

The Dowager Duchess told him when he was 13 years old that chocolate wasn't good for his skin. He's now 55 and still doesn't eat chocolate. Unless it's white chocolate, which apparently doesn't count.

Our sister Dale died in 1981 in Sheffield, England, when The Kid Brother was 21. We and our parents went to the hospice to say our good-byes. It was such an awful shock to see his big sister that way that he has refused to make a hospital visit ever since. Just being around someone who's ill makes him very nervous. 

So, of course The Kid Brother wouldn't visit the Dowager Duchess during the 7-1/2 weeks of her  hospital stay. I was pleased to be able to convince him to come to the apartment once she was home (before I came back to Spain). He only stayed briefly and then he and I went out for lunch. Having a stranger in the house (the home healthcare worker) threw him off.

Well, The Dowager Duchess is on her own again. After five weeks she, too, has had more than enough of a stranger in the house. So, now I'm trying to convince The Kid Brother that things are back to normal and he can return to his old routine. 

I just have to break him of his new routine. 

When I spoke with him Friday (to convince him to visit our mother on Saturday), he said, "Maybe in December."

I have my work cut out for me. (But I'm hoping he'll come around by this weekend.)

Meanwhile, I'm awfully pensive and unfocused lately. Maybe The Kid Brother's routines wouldn't be such a bad thing.

MUSY HAS ALSO BEEN VERY PENSIVE LATELY.
I LOVE THAT ELBOW.


For some reason, I woke up with this song in my head...

24 comments:

  1. That's rough with your kid brother - hopefully he will realize that she is home for good now and not sick and go visit. Change is difficult for everyone

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    1. Cheapchick:
      Just makes the days more interesting. Anyway, progress has been made. More on that later today.

      Delete
  2. It must be difficult dealing with your brother's limitations but I admire how you interact with him. You're an exceptionally good brother, in case no one has told you that in a while.

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    1. Stephen:
      Thanks. I love the Kid Brother and, after all these years, I don't really think of him as having limitations -- simply personal quirks. It makes it easier!

      Delete
  3. You are amazing with your brother; just amazing.

    And Musy sitting there, propped on one elbow is high-larious.

    And a Loggins and Messina tune is always a welcome treat.

    That's three for three on this post! Bravo!

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    1. Bob:
      Three for three? My work is done! That Musy pose had me cracking up. He looked so human (but don't tell him I said that).

      Delete
  4. Musy is VERY photogenic. I can understand your brother - keeping things constant is a way of minimizing the need to make decisions; it keeps life simple and under control. Personally, I love change and chafe against routine; I am easily bored. But I do like to get my meals on time!

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    1. Wilma:
      Musy doesn't like to pose for pictures. So, it's rare to get him to stay in position ... unless he's asleep. After the final elbow shot, he jumped down and left the room -- which is why the photos aren't as sharp as the ones I get with Dudo.

      Delete
  5. wow your cat is wonderful and the brother ,too

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  6. Happy to hear your mother is one her own...I bet she is ecstatic!
    OCD is a very interesting condition....to say the least! I worked with a few OCD kids over the years......I learned a lot! I am sure you have as well, Mitchell.
    Musy is adorable and right at home, I see!
    This post was very focused and thoughtful.

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    1. Jim:
      I've got a bit of OCD myself, so it's not hard for me to understand SOME of my brother's quirks.

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  7. Love that picture of Musy with her arm (leg?) over the edge of the couch!

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    1. Linda:
      That's definitely Musy's arm (from my point of view).

      Delete
  8. Love Musy's pensive pose. Pensive isn't necessarily a bad thing, although it can be a bit disconcerting - we all need a bit of fallowness from time to time, to gather ourselves together again.

    I know you'll be water to your brother's stone, and wear him down. =)

    How have I never heard this song before? Love it! Sending love and hugs to all the Spanish contingent. xo

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    1. Jacqueline:
      Success on the brother front (more on that later). I can't believe you'd never heard this song before! Maybe it maybe made it to Indiana!?!

      Delete
  9. Sounds like D & M are helping you cling onto sanity - and San G of course.

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    1. Raybeard:
      Ha! San Geraldo will get a good laugh at the thought of being one of my sanity checks. Well... maybe by comparison.

      Delete
  10. the cat has a fund life observing you, your mom and brother - I wonder what the cat's blog entry would read

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    1. Travel:
      If Musy could write, he'd probably complain that we don't spend every minute following him around the house. He's kind of bossy.

      Delete
  11. Also loving the cat pose with elbow. Or knee. Or whatever it is they have. Style and poise, always!

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    1. Michael:
      Definitely an elbow. That's his arm! His legs are down below.

      Delete
  12. All my thoughts have alrady been posted by others.... You're the best!

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    Replies
    1. Sharon:
      I need to start these posts with a disclaimer: I am not fishing for compliments!

      But, thanks just the same!

      Delete

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