Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Cranky Jacqueline

One of the things I love about blogging is the opportunity to connect with special people from all around the world. I had to leave the United States in 2011 to become good friends with someone in Indiana, Jaqueline of "Cranky Bar." Jacqueline later moved to Florida but she remained just as fascinating.

We very quickly formed a special bond and, at her suggestion, we began to Skype every so often, shared email regularly, and even spent nearly two hours on the phone while I waited for a plane at Kennedy Airport after spending the summer of 2015 in New York as a result of one of my mother's medical emergencies. I enjoyed every minute I spent talking with Jacqueline; and I HATE talking on the telephone, so that says a lot.

Jacqueline passed away February 6 at the young age of 55. She had been living with Parkinson's Disease and a number of other related problems. She had a stroke in September (after sending me love on the death of my mother).

Jacqueline often insisted she was a cranky type and easy to take a disliking to. But I think she was making that up. I found her irreverent, but never cranky, and unbelievably easy to love. She was a powerful woman who survived adversity with a smile, a joke, and with empathy and kindness.

She was a gifted writer. Her short stories, often inspired by random photos she would collect, were works of brilliance. Inspiring, magical, moving, and sometimes fantastical. If you have the time scan through the Cranky Bar blog for some examples.

She adored her family and spoke lovingly of her daughter, Jenn (aka, Jennie; aka The Kidling) and her mother, also Jennie (or maybe I should have said her daughter "also Jennie").

She and I could and did talk about everything under the sun. She was enlightened, intelligent, generous, quick-witted, and self-deprecating. She made me smile and she made me laugh and she made me feel loved.

Jaqueline's mother, Jennie, posted info about a celebration of Jacqueline's life. It made me smile, too.

The celebration will be held at the Oy Vey Bakery-Deli at 2170 13th St. Terre Haute, IN, February 26, from 3:00 to 6:00.

The Kidling summed up her mother, and herself I think, on Facebook by suggesting how we might honor Jacqueline's memory.
If you'd like a way to honor Jacquelineand Mitchell, here are a few ideas.
One Good Thing:
Every day, write down one good thing. It doesn't have to be something big, just something that makes you smile.
 
Learn the Signs Of A Stroke:
FAST [Facial drooping, Arm weakness, Speech difficulties; Time to call emergency services.]
 
Advocate for Children:
Be the person that a child in a bad situation needs; listen and believe them. If there was one thing mom couldn't stand, it was leaving a child — any child — without help.

And, from me, something Jacqueline once shared...

34 comments:

  1. that was a lovely tribute; thank you for sharing this. Blogging does give us the gift of people.

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    1. Spo:
      When I started blogging it was simply to tell some stories. I had no idea how much I would get in return.

      Delete
  2. lovely tribute to Jacqueline... you've captured her perfectly. She always said how cranky she was, but I never found that to be true either. She was one of the most generous souls I've ever met. And if cranky means calling things as they are ... then bring on the cranky

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    1. AntiquityTravelers:
      Thanks so much for stopping by. I wonder if anyone ever really saw the cranky. There was definitely honesty, never unkindness.

      Delete
  3. Lovely post Mitchell. Bloggers are such wonderful people. One of the best friends I have I met through blogging. Jacqueline was too young but I know firsthand the consequences of Parkinson's. RIP Jacqueline.

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    1. Cat Lover:
      I would complain FOR DAYS about a 24-hour stomach bug... and Jacqueline would actually sympathize with me. One would think she would have said, "Sick? You call that sick?"

      Delete
  4. What a wonderful way to honor her memory. I never saw a bit of crankiness in her, either. And that celebration of life brought a grin to my face, as well. That is just the most Jacqueline way to honor and celebrate her life.

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    1. A Beer:
      It would be so great if we all could go to the Oy Vey Bakery. What a celebration!

      Delete
  5. It's amazing how like-minded hearts and souls like you and Jacqueline are brought together in cyberspace. Thank you, Mitchell. I really appreciate that you included the ceremony details too. Much love and light.

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    1. Robyn:
      Love and light being sent right back to you. I really want to go to the Oy Vey Bakery!

      Delete
  6. Ohhh, I'm so sorry to know that you've lost this friendship, MItchell. So young!
    I'm going to share that great comment about not seeing yourself through the eyes of those who don't value you :)

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    1. Judy:
      I'm sorry for her daughter, mother, and other family and friends. Jacqueline shared a lot of wise words.

      Delete
  7. A beautiful tribute! And isn't it just so perfect that her celebration of life will be at the Oy Vey Bakery-Deli! Now THAT'S style!

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  8. OMB, she was younger than I am! I only "knew" her through comments I saw on john gray's blog. RIP.

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  9. So sorry about your friend. Hugs

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    1. Cheapchick:
      Wishing her family peace and lots of happy memories.

      Delete
  10. We will sure miss Jacqueline in blogland. She was a force unto herself. Thanks for sharing your memories of her.

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  11. She seems swell to me and anyone having a gathering at a place called Oy Vey Bakery has got to have good humor. I too have met several bloggers and have hit it off with all of them so far. It's amazing how you can connect. I just wished you had more time with her.

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    1. mistress maddie:
      She touched a lot of people and made a difference.

      Delete
  12. So sorry for your loss, Mitchell. I do remember seeing Jacqueline's comments on both yours and John's blogs.
    A lovely tribute here.

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    1. Jim:
      Several others wrote wonderful tributes, too. She deserved them all. She was one of a kind.

      Delete
  13. A lovely and loving tribute... may she rest in peace...

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    1. Willym:
      And may her family find joy in her memory.

      Delete
  14. Jacqueline must have been exceptionally special. You're the fourth blogger to comment on her passing. My condolences for the loss of your blogging friend.

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    1. Stephen:
      She was a rare human being. I've never met her daughter but she seems to be cut from the same cloth.

      Delete
  15. I wish I had read her blog over the years, she sounds like an amazing person. Losses remind us to live, to enjoy the adventure. Love everyday as if it were your last.

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    1. Travel:
      Check out her stories if you can. They are brilliant. I hope her daughter considers publishing a collection. I always marveled at her imagination. I first met her through another blog that she ended up shutting down for various reasons. I was so glad she immediately started the new one. She was one of a kind.

      Delete
  16. Very nice tribute indeed. So thoughtful of you and so well written.

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    1. Laurent:
      Thanks so much. It wasn't as much as she deserved. A very special person.

      Delete
  17. Very nice tribute, Mitchell. Jacqueline somehow stumbled upon my then-Indianapolis based blog some years back (I moved to North Carolina in summer 2017) and felt compelled to drop a few kind words in the comments area. Those words made my day, perhaps because I knew my blog didn't fetch a lot of traffic, so any hint that someone was actually absorbing the content was satisfying. She was still living in Terre Haute at the time, so I'm guessing that our Indiana connection appealed to her. She would plug my blog in a subsequent post of hers and would later add comments on a couple dozen or more future posts of mine, frequently remarking about the familiarity of this or that place in the Indianapolis area that I happened to be featuring at the time. Her comments made me realize that our connection was stronger than I first thought -- we both not only knew Indiana, but also Indianapolis. I visited her blog most days after that first interaction, and I would drop in observations and comments periodically ... not just because I felt obligated, but because I enjoyed her voice. She was real. But when she changed blog names a couple times after that, I lost track of her for a short period, not finding her until she would drop in a new comment on one of my posts. Then in one of her later blog iterations, I noticed she had moved to Florida. Shortly after that ... her blog posts stopped. I'm not sure how I learned the reason -- that she had passed (I think it was through a mutual friend on Facebook), but I suspected the worst because she chronicled her health woes in many of her posts. I eventually did learn about her passing a couple months into 2017. But I never found an obituary for her, though I tried often. And multiple times. I didn't come across this post of yours until today -- and it's 2020! I apologize for rambling like this. Like many of the people who have commented here, I didn't think she was cranky at all, either! Thanks for mentioning that there was a celebration of life gathering for her. She deserved it.

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    1. Joe,
      Thanks so much for your comment. I was just yesterday thinking about Jacqueline. Can’t believe she’s been gone nearly three years. We weren’t friends for long but she sure made an impact. Skype was a wonderful gift! What a special human being.

      Delete

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