Friday, August 10, 2012

Lazy Bones


Depending on what weather forecast I read, it's either going to be 43C or 44+C today (109F or 112F). It's already hotter than that and still has another couple of hours to climb. Yesterday was supposedly cooler than today. It hit around 46C (115F). At this rate, I suppose it really doesn't matter where the thermometer lands, San Geraldo and I are not experiencing it first-hand, remaining in the comfort of our freshly painted and fairly clean apartment. Early this morning, San Geraldo watered the plants on the balconies and the cats got their fresh-air fix. Since then, the doors have been closed and the air-conditioning on. As usual, Moose lies in the shade and Dudo lies in the sun. We've been out for breakfast. I've been to the post office and then to El Sanedrín to say a brief "hola." The only reason I might consider going back outside is to go to the gym.


Work crews are out in force on a major project over the next year or more to upgrade/replace the sewer pipes along the streets of old Sevilla. Our side street is scheduled for some time next year, I think. It's amazing to see how quickly these crews get the work done and how beautifully they rebuild the structures to align with the ancient construction. But, it must be awful to work in the oppressive heat. The daily siesta is I'm sure a life-saver.


As I mentioned above, I stopped off at El Sanedrín to say "hola" to Adela. I was pleased to bump into José, a recent acquaintance who is an exceptionally talented professional artist and sculptor. He's currently working on a piece for the nuns of the convent next door to us, Convento de Santa Rosalía. The order, the Community of Poor Clares, celebrates the 800th anniversary of its founding and José has the honor of creating a sculpture to commemorate the occasion. He showed me a snapshot from his smartphone. It's stunning. The life-size relief sculpture will be on display to the public on the 15th of this month. I'll be doing a blog on José and his art once I've photographed the finished piece. José's talent is not limited to sacred works, but that's where he's able to make a living locally.

So, how does this relate to the subtitle "THE HEAT"? When I mentioned to José that tomorrow was supposed to be even hotter than today, he said, "Oh, no, ask anyone at the Church of San Lorenzo and they'll tell you this is the hottest day of the year."

He saw my blank look and explained, "This is the day San Lorenzo was stripped naked and burned alive." He then added, pointing to his crotch, "Part by part." Adela's eyes opened wide in shock. "Really?" she asked. "Really," he said.

I can't verify any of this, but it led me to tell them about deep-fried Rocky Mountain Oysters.
  1. 2 lbs BULL TESTICLES (calf, lamb, sheep, or turkey testicles can also be used)
  2. 2 tablespoons salt, 1 tablespoon vinegar, 1 cup flour, 1/4 cup cornmeal, 1 cup red wine, salt, pepper, garlic powder, bottled hot sauce, cooking oil (for frying) or fat (for frying)  
  1. Split the tough skin-like muscle that surrounds each "oyster" (use a sharp knife).
  2. You can also remove the skin easily if the meat is frozen and then peeled while thawing.
  3. Soak in a pan of salt water one hour; drain.
  4. Transfer to a large pot and add enough water to float the meat.
  5. Add the vinegar to the pot. 
  6. Parboil, drain and rinse. 
  7. Let cool and slice each oyster into 1/4 inch thick ovals. 
  8. Sprinkle salt and pepper on both sides of sliced oyster to taste. 
  9. Combine flour, cornmeal and some garlic powder to taste. 
  10. Roll each slice into flour mixture. 
  11. Dip into milk. Roll again into flour mixture. Dip into wine.  
  12. Fry in hot oil or fat seasoned with the bottled hot sauce to taste (be careful, it will sizzle when you add the hot sauce); fry until golden brown.  
  13. Drain on paper towels. 
  14. Serve with COCKTAIL SAUCE if desired.


  1. My late mother's recipe for Rocky Mountain Oysters was simpler - light a fire under a bull's back legs, look it in the eye and point a finger at it so that it daren't move during cooking, then just before serving signal to the bull that it may cool its nadgers off in a bucket of sauce. You can't get fresher than that.

    1. The Owl Wood:
      Your mother was a very clever woman.

  2. Hello Mitch:
    Well, this is an extremely varied post with which you delight us today!! Cats always seem to have the right idea whatever the weather conditions and it does seem to be scorchingly hot with you at present. It really makes Budapest's 28C look positively cool.

    Perhaps we shall 'chillax' with the cats and leave the 'hot food' to others!!

    Happy weekend!

    1. Jane and Lance:
      I decided long ago to leave Rocky Mountain Oysters to others.

      It is supposedly "only" 42C right now. But all outside thermometers read higher. Your 28C sounds a bit chilly. Don't forget your sweaters (pullys?)

  3. Oh, what a life! (for your pussies)

    Saint Lawrence is, of course, renowned mostly (and unfortunately, from the Church's POV) for making a jest about his needing to be turned over as one side had been roasted sufficiently. ("Done to a turn" one could say!) If true, he certainly had balls - which brings me to your oyster recipe, but which, after seeing the first line, I skated over.

    The song 'Lazy Bones' is wonderful, isn't it - the music perfectly capturing the mood of the lyrics.

    1. Ha! When I read your first sentence, I though it said "you" and not "your"!

      Now that you mention that Saint Lawrence story, it does ring a ball... I mean bell.

      I have never and will never try oysters of the Rocky Mountain variety. And real oysters remind me too much of mucous.

      I always loved "Lazy Bones." There are a number of good versions on YouTube. The Mills Brothers have a great recording, but it's more than 6 minutes long.

    2. Re: your opener immediately above - :-o No, I'd never think THAT of you, Mitch. (But it's still funny).

    3. Raybeard:
      Truth is, your opener is funny in a number of interpretations!

  4. I wanna be reincarnated as a cat.
    Oy, what a life.

    Not so those poor fellas working IN the streets in that heat!

    1. Bob:
      What a life these cats have.

      And those poor guys out working in this heat. There's also a crew renovating a house across the street from us. They must make 20 trips a day across the plaza to a dumpster with a wheel barrow filled with cement slabs. I don't know how they do it.

  5. Thank you for including Leon Redbone's "Lazy Bones". It's been a long time since I used to see him on SNL. Your cats must be the most photogenic kitties ever. Never a bad pose or picture.

    1. Ms. Sparrow:
      I love Leon Redbone, so it was great to find his version of "Lazy Bones."

      As for those cats, they are definitely photogenic. Our first cats in San Diego, Dobie and Maynard, were beauties. But they were all black and it was really difficult to get a decent photo of either of them. With Dudo and Moose, I can just snap away.

  6. It can be over 100 outside, I will have the doors and windows closed air cranked, and my cat Fancy will always sneek her way into the attic to lay in the sweltering heat....cats are such funny little things :)

    Have a great day Mr B, stay cool :)

    1. Monkey Man:
      Well, I'm soon to head up to the roof to get the laundry off the line. Maybe Fancy wants to join me.

  7. Fortunately, my man berries will be properly chilled by air conditioning today. Didn't know that about San Lorenzo. Ouch!

    1. Stephen:
      And Raybeard provided some more specifics about San Lorenzo (Saint Lawrence), too. Chilled berries are very good.

  8. like the cat... will pass on the bulls balls

  9. Well, contrary to everyone else... I'm sorry I passed up my chance for that dinner with my Mexican friends.. A person HAS to try EVERYTHING in life that they can. I've fixed beef tongue... why not the other parts? That aside, I'm fascinated with the masonry work those guys are doing.... And hey... do you REALLY live beside a convent?

    1. The Odd Essay:
      Oh, if you live in Sevilla, you live close to a convent... or a church... or a monastery. The one closest to us is Santa Rosalía, but there are others in every direction. Check out this earlier blog post that tells about my first discovery of Santa Rosalía:

  10. Let's be clear...I am not eating bull testicles. LOL

    1. kisatrtle:
      I'll eat them as soon as I cook them... which means never.

  11. In Canada, we call them 'Prairie Oysters'! And I am with you on not trying those suckers!
    I will never again complain about the heat that we are getting....115 degrees?!
    Those cats are adorable and have 'the life'!
    I grew up with a convent just down the street from my house and in the summers the 'postulents', nuns in-training, would silently walk by in a line on their way to the park up the street. We kids would just sit and watch them.

    1. That would be 'postulants'....thank you very much.

    2. Jim:
      They're also known as prairie oysters in the states. Here in Spain, apparently, they simply call them what they are. I knew what you meant by "postulents"; you could have just pretended it was the Canadian spelling (you know, like "colour" as opposed to "color").

  12. Any interesting side effects from those oysters?

    1. Frank:
      Unfortunately, I'll never know... Maybe you should do an experiment.


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