Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Davie Disgusted / Davie Disgustado

La versión español está después de la versión inglés.

EVERYONE LOVED MY father. He was a great guy. Generous. Kind. Fun-loving. Funny. Patient. Supportive. A good neighbor. Hard-working. Scout Master of the Boy Scouts. Good-luck charm at the Bingo hall where he volunteered for the parent-run organization that provided services for The Kid Brother. Attractive to women and men. My women friends had crushes on him. He was propositioned by the husband of my mother's friend. The guy was  simply irresistible.

My cousins adored him. Even my maternal grandfather, who liked almost no one, loved my father.

I saw all this growing up although I didn't experience much of it first-hand. My father wasn't the same with his own kids. So many twisted reasons, I'm sure. High expectations, high hopes, among other things. He wasn't easy for us to please — nearly impossible. But, he was at least a very responsible parent, so no need to dwell. I simply tell you a bit about him so you might get some insight into the two photos my mother herself captioned in the 1940s.

On the back of the first, taken on their honeymoon, she wrote: "Davie Getting Disgusted." On the back of the second, taken nearly two years later, she wrote: "Davie Disgusted." You can see the difference.

Wanting to be just like my father, I practiced that look until I perfected it. At some time during my years with San Geraldo, I lost the look (mostly).

My father smiled, too. My parents adored each other.

TODO EL MUNDO amaban a mi padre. Era un gran tipo. Generoso. Divertido. Gracioso. Paciente. Apoyo. Un buen vecino. Trabajador. El jefe de los Boy Scouts. Un encanto de buena suerte en la sala de Bingo donde se ofreció como voluntario para la organización dirigida por los padres que proporcionaba servicios para El Hermanito. Atractivo para mujeres y hombres. Mis amigas se habían apoderado de él. Fue propuesto por el marido de la amiga de mi madre. El tipo era simplemente irresistible.

Mis primos le adoraban. Incluso mi abuelo materno, a quien casi nadie le gustaba, amaba a mi padre.

Vi todo esto cuando estaba creciendo, aunque no tenía esa experiencia de mi padre de primera mano. Mi padre no era igual con sus propios hijos. Tantas razones torcidas, estoy seguro. Grandes expectativas, grandes esperanzas, entre otras cosas. Él no fue fácil para nosotros agradar — casi imposible. Pero él era por lo menos un padre muy responsable así que ninguna necesidad de morar. Simplemente le digo un poco sobre él para que pueda tener una idea de las dos fotos que mi madre subtituló en los años 40.

En la parte posterior de la primera foto, hecha en su luna de miel, mi madre escribió: "Davie que consigue disgustado." En la parte de atrás de la segunda, hecha casi dos años después, escribió: "Davie disgustado". Puedes ver la diferencia.

Queriendo ser como mi padre, practiqué ese aspecto hasta que lo perfeccioné. En algún momento durante mis años con San Geraldo, perdí la mirada (sobre todo).

Mi padre sonrió, también. Mis padres se adoraban.

HONEYMOON, OCTOBER 1947, NEVELE COUNTRY CLUB, ELLENVILLE, NY. "GETTING DISGUSTED."
LUNA DE MIEL, OCTUBRE 1947. "QUE CONSIGUE DISGUSTADO."
CONEY ISLAND BOARDWALK, 1949. "DISGUSTED."
PASEO MARÍTIMO DE CONEY ISLAND, 1949. "DISGUSTADO."

32 comments:

  1. pix #2 - I throw that look at my co-workers daily. and at donald dump supporters every second.

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    1. anne marie:
      I can't help myself. I still do it when I'm not aware. Mention of The Dump always gets me.

      Delete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    1. Try this again ....

      Your father is smoldering in that first picture. Just sayin'.

      I like the third one best of all, though.

      Delete
    2. Bob:
      Yeah, he was smoldering... and he had no clue as far as anyone could tell. At a restaurant one night with a group of friends a woman tried to pick him up at the bar (my mother was nearby and saw it all). She posed and asked for a light. He picked up a book of matches from a basket on the bar, smiled broadly, and gave her the book. My mother said it was then she realized she had nothing to worry about.

      Delete
  3. I agree with Bob!!!! That first picture? Oh my.... And I see where you look much like him too. Minus the hair of course. Now go be smoldering all day dear.

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    1. mistress maddie:
      We had pretty much the same hair. And mine lasted longer than his!

      Delete
  4. Funny/strange how some parents have difficulty showing affection/love for their children.....guess they didn't have the best role models themselves.
    Great photos to have, Mitchell. Thanks for sharing.

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    1. Jim:
      I was told in later years (by my mother) that his father treated him the same way -- although she simply told me how his father treated him, not appreciating it was the same as how my father treated me.

      Delete
  5. The photos made me smile for some reason. Must be all that seriousness it evokes. Lovely and heartwarming thoughts indeed, nice of you to share.

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    1. Blogoratti:
      Going through all these old photos has been a mixed but mostly happy experience.

      Delete
  6. Lots of passion in the 3rd shot!

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    1. Wilma:
      My mother was appalled by any "passion" shots from those years.

      Delete
  7. I don't think my father was as well-liked, but I'm not sure. He sure wasn't a perfectionist, he left the parenting to my mother

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    1. Adam:
      My mother was at home for us but my father took us everywhere, yelled at us (well, my mother did that, too, but he REALLY yelled), and was clearly the boss.

      Delete
  8. Maybe whoever took those photos forgot the "say cheese" part. He was a good-looking dude, though.

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    1. Kirk:
      Well, my mother took the first 2. Paparazzo took the third I think. They never tell you to say cheese.

      Delete
  9. Oh being a parent can be very difficult... baby arrives and grows... in my day there was no parenting classes as there are today.
    So it was very much rule of thumb and omitting things that your own parents did that you did not like.

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    1. Heron:
      Not everyone is cut out for parenting. My father was at least very responsible, although he didn't often seem to enjoy it. There were at least moments!

      Delete
  10. What a handsome charmer, and the heat between your parents is still simmering from the photo.
    It's interesting that we and our loved ones took off a lot of masks behind closed doors. Humans are so complicated. Aren't we?

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    1. Robyn:
      The heat lasted their entire marriage. We were often in the way I think!

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  11. I am one of the cousins that adored him,,,, and then again,,, I adore my cousin even more!

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    1. Sheree:
      And we'll see each other soon!!!

      Delete
  12. I have often wondered about your father, because you don't mention him often. So, I was eager to read this, and then to scroll down and see the photos... and ... bam! There's Mitchell! I love how we can see your wonderful face as having come from his. Amazing how that happens.

    Too bad he didn't have your great smile :)
    Judy

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    1. Judy:
      I'll probably start sharing more now. He died in '87. My mother lived 39 years with him and nearly 29 without. And they dated for 4 years before they were married.

      Delete
  13. Your dad was a looker. Now wonder he got so much attention.

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    1. Stephen:
      He was also really charming. A good man. A difficult father, but a very good man.

      Delete
  14. You look so like him! And yes, he was smoulderingly gorgeous. Lucky Dowager Duchess (and lucky Jerry, of course).

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    1. Rozzie:
      Thanks. There's definitely a strong resemblance. I just never felt like I pulled it off as well. And the strong resemblance took a while to appear (in my mind at least). I sure didn't look like that in my early 20s!

      Delete
  15. Fathers ~ for me not having a father I never knew the nuances of what a father could offer me in my life. All I knew is that bringing up his name always elicited sadness. So.....it was rarely discussed. I now have a fairly good understanding of what death can bring to a family (early in the relationship). I have watched so many families with fathers and just wondered "what would that be like". Reading your story about Davie saddens me also because, just like Jim's family the parents doubted on everyone else family members and not their won. Life can be a real kicker.

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    Replies
    1. Ron:
      Thanks so much for your comment. You and I could have a powerful conversation about this I think.

      Delete

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