Monday, August 21, 2017

Killer Thighs / Muslos Asesinos

La versión español está después de la versión inglés.

WHEN SAN GERALDO and I lived in Connecticut, we had a house with beautiful grounds and a swimming pool. It was a great place for parties. I have always had an affinity for giraffes (primarily because I looked like one when I was growing up — all arms and legs, and a long skinny neck). So, when we were buying pool toys, we bought a large inflatable giraffe. We had friends who lived nearby on a lake and we took my giraffe to a weekend barbecue at their house. San Geraldo got rough with my giraffe and squeezed its neck so hard between his killer thighs that it exploded. I still have nightmares.

 I want to rescue all mistreated inflatable creatures.

CUANDO SAN GERALDO y yo vivíamos en Connecticut, teníamos una casa con hermosos jardines y una piscina. Fue un gran lugar para fiestas. Siempre he tenido una afinidad por las jirafas (principalmente porque me parecía una cuando yo estaba creciendo — todo brazos y piernas, y un cuello flaco y largo). Así que, cuando estábamos comprando juguetes de la piscina, compramos una jirafa inflable grande. Teníamos amigos que vivían cerca con una casa en un lago y llevamos a mi jirafa a una barbacoa un fin de semana. San Geraldo se puso duro con mi jirafa y lo apretó el cuello tan fuerte entre sus muslos asesinos y lo explotó. Todavía tengo pesadillas.

Quiero rescatar a todas las criaturas inflables maltratadas.

THE IN-LAWS WITH MY GIRAFFE IN 1991. ALICE WAS BEING THE WIND IN THE GIRAFFE'S SAIL (NECK).
LOS SUEGROS CON MI JIRAFA EN 1991. ALICE ESTABA SIENDO EL VIENTO EN LA VELA (EL CUELLO) DE LA JIRAFA.
WHY DINOSAURS ARE EXTINCT. SAN GERALDO WITH A TRICERATOPS.
POR QUÉ LOS DINOSAURIOS ESTÁN EXTINTOS. SAN GERALDO CON UN TRICERATOPS.
A CROCODILE ATTACK!!!
¡¡¡UN ATAQUE DE COCODRILO!!!
WHO SAYS UNICORNS ARE EXTINCT?!?
QUIÉN DICE QUE LOS UNICORNIOS ESTÁN EXTINTOS?
THIS FLAMINGO NEEDS TO BE RESCUED.
ESTE FLAMENCO NECESITA SER RESCATADO.
TIGER SHARK?!?
¿¡¿TIBURÓN TIGRE?!?

24 comments:

  1. The giraffe probably thought it was a great way to go.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wilma:
      I can't be sure. But, it's facial expression never changed.

      Delete
  2. There's actually a huge following for men and women both that can crush things with their thighs. I think watermelons are the 'standard' in that kind of online 'community'. All I'm saying is that if San Geraldo gets a 'job offer' off of this post, don't be surprised. But do be a little weirded out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A Beer For The Shower:
      Hmmm... Maybe he's employable after all. I'm going to buy him a watermelon.

      Delete
  3. interesting post today, dear. does jerry still have those killer thighs?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I think I'd take the Rainbow Unicorn .... for obvious reasons.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Somebody needs to spearhead a movement to protect inflatable animals, and you're the perfect guy for the job.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I love the shops where they sell these pool toys, so many colours, so much fun and the smell of new plastic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Laurent:
      I do, too. Well, except for maybe the smell.

      Delete
  7. Hm-m-m-m-m....food for thought?!
    Much better than those awful plaids and stripes combos!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jim:
      Oh, I've begun to love those combos!

      Delete
  8. Greeting from P-Town!!!! I ADORE THE GIRAFFE ALSO!!!!! It would come in handy at the Boat Slip pool and not one has been seen!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. mistress maddie:
      I can only imagine the embarrassing positions that poor giraffe would find himself in at the Boat Slip!

      Delete
  9. Giraffe with a capital "G" and that rhymes with "P" and that stands for... well, you know.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Be careful with those thighs! Enjoy the pool toys.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Travel:
      I always am careful. Jerry is built like a viking.

      Delete
  11. These are amazingly beautiful photos! The colors! I especially love the one with the blue sea behind the thatched-roof umbrellas... amazing!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Judy:
    More views of the beach to come. The sun umbrellas are in definied areas all along the beach (they call these sombrillas). Some are more elegant than others. You can rent a chaise lounge (hamaca) and sombrilla for the day for 4 or 4.50. Some places have free WI-FI and food/drink service from the chiringuitos. Not a bad way to spend a few hours. And, yes, the colors!

    ReplyDelete

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