Tuesday, July 3, 2018

Get The Feathers Out Of Your Ass / Saca Las Plumas De Tu Culo

La versión español está después de la foto.

MY MOTHER THE Dowager Duchess had a friend — a mean-spirited, selfish, sharp-tongued friend — I'll call Leah. Somehow, they were friends for nearly 20 years. Not good, dear, trusted friends who had fun together, but friends nonetheless. My mother spent money in Leah's antique shop. In 1970, when my mother redecorated the apartment, she paid Leah to take her to private showrooms (Leah was an interior decorator) and help her find unusual items. Leah's husband, a perfect match for her, framed some of our art. There was always some obvious flaw and Leah would tell my mother, "Oh, stop it! It's nothing!"

For those 20 years, my mother complained that Leah was mean-spirited, selfish, and sharp-tongued. (Remember, the Dowager Duchess couldn't stand her dinette set and kept it for 50 years, and a hated set of 1947 wedding pots and pans until she died in 2016.)

Anyway, when I was 22, Leah arranged for me to interview with her son-in-law who had a "factory." In New Jersey! He offered me a job in the mailroom. In New Jersey! I turned it down. Leah said, "Get the feathers out of your ass, Mitchell! You're not a peacock!"

When I got my first job, I bought myself an expensive hand-painted silk peacock tie at Saks Fifth Avenue.

In Conil last week, I found a much more practical response to Leah. Oh, how I'd love to float by her window on this.

What grudge should you have let go of years ago?


MI MADRE LA Duquesa Viuda tenía una amiga — una amiga mezquina, egoísta, y de lengua afilada — voy a llamar Leah. De alguna manera, fueron amigas por casi 20 años. No buenas, queridas, amigas de confianza que se divirtieron juntos, pero amigas no obstante. Mi madre gastó dinero en la tienda de antigüedades de Leah. En 1970, cuando mi madre redecoró el apartamento, pagó a Leah para que la llevara a salas de exposición privadas (Leah era una decoradora de interiores) y la ayudó a encontrar objetos inusuales. El marido de Leah, una pareja perfecta para ella, enmarcó nuestro arte. Siempre había algún defecto obvio y Leah le decía a mi madre: "¡Oh, basta! ¡No es nada!"

Durante esos 20 años, mi madre se quejó de que Leah era mezquina, egoísta, y de lengua afilada. (Recuerde, la Duquesa Viuda no pudo soportar su juego de comedor y lo mantuvo durante 50 años y un odiado juego de cacerolas y sartenes para la boda de 1947 hasta que murió en 2016.)

De todos modos, cuando yo tenía 22 años, Leah arregló para que entreviste a su yerno que tenía una "fábrica." ​​En Nueva Jersey! Él me ofreció un trabajo en la sala de correo. En Nueva Jersey! Lo rechacé. Leah dijo: "¡Saca las plumas del culo, Mitchell! ¡No eres un pavo real!"

En Conil la semana pasada, encontré finalmente mi respuesta a Leah. Oh, cómo me encantaría flotar por su ventana en esto.

¿Que rencor debería haber soltado hace años?

28 comments:

  1. It involved a glass of water, and I will try to let go. Foregiveness is something we do to set ourselves free from carrying the burden of anger.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Travel:
      This actually didn't even make me angry. I thought the comment was funny and I gave no weight to anything she said. But it's funny how every time i see a peacock it comes back to me. I won't mention a glass of water.

      Delete
  2. That Leah was a piece of work.

    I'd have found an entire peacock costume and walked into her shop[ wearing it.

    ReplyDelete
  3. She was so wrong. Mean spirited people are their own worst enemies. By nature I don't hold grudges; it is too much work and makes me feel bad, but I'm sure there are some lurking somewhere inside.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wilma:
      I really don't have a grudge against Leah. She was so mean-spirited that i never took anything she said seriously. I've managed to let go of a lot from my past, but some things linger.

      Delete
  4. I know that bearing grudges can be self harming.
    Much healthier to express your hurt/grievance to the provoker, than hold it in than let it cause unnecessary pain and hurt.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Heron:
      I'm much better now at saying what's on mind without expressing anger. The Leah story is really nothing more than funny. A great line -- although intended unkindly -- from someone I had no time for didn't give any power.

      Delete
  5. Oh these angry people out there! A lot of pent-up anger we all have to deal with.
    Too bad Leah hasn't been told over the years.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jim:
      Oh, Leah was told and told. She was surrounded by other outspoken New Yorkers. What a piece of work.

      Delete
  6. I hold on to grudges forever.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm too busy feeling guilty for things I did or didn't do to put grudges at the top of the list. I know that when people act in angry ways it is actually all about them and their shortcomings and I try to realize it isn't about me at all. They are revealing a lot about themselves that I don't think they see.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. sillygirl:
      That's probably more how I am (feeling guilty). Lean was a miserable person and shared it with the world. I really gave no weight to what she said. I think the peacock comment sticks in my mind because it was so snarky while being so hilarious.

      Delete
  8. I love peacocks! I remember your story about the tie. She would love to see you floating on that. I don't know I'm one to hold a grudge.

    Unless you count the grudge I hold on the asses who put Trump in.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. mistress maddie:
      Thanks for remembering the earlier post! I miss that tie! And, yes, I guess I'll be holding onto the Trump grudge for a long, long time.

      Delete
  9. Peacock? Are you sure it wasn't the mailroom at NBC rather than a factory?

    I don't really see grudges per se as an act of free will. You hold one to one whether you want to or not. ACTING on that grudge involves free will (or at least conscious thought.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kirk:
      If it had been the mailroom at NBC, I might have considered it!

      Delete
  10. I will hold my grudges to my grave. and those that know me know I am a happy contented person. but if you cross me, if you use me as your personal doormat, watch out, for I WILL exact revenge!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I wish I could let things go.... but certain ( but few) grudges I keep going

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. John:
      I have managed to let go of a lot in my life, which wasn't always an easy thing for me. But there are some grudges that seem to have lives of their own. Truly, the peacock thing is just funny... very funny. Leah never had that power over me.

      Delete
  12. Debra:
    I thought and think the comment was hilarious, although nasty. I had to keep from laughing when she said it.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I still struggle with hurts and injustices from my first job 1992-2000. I wish it would stop bugging me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Spo:
      I THINK I'm pretty much over the hurts and injustices of my illustrious career. It helps that I've been retired and much happier for 7 years! I STILL struggle with the hurts and injustices from my family... but even that's gotten better.

      Delete
  14. Hey hey hey HEY... what's this, "In NEW JERSEY!" like that's the worst thing in the world??
    Heh heh :)
    I grew up in NJ, but only in nice neighborhoods, around nice people, who only had a little bit of a Joyseeee accent.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Judy:
      There are very, very nice places in New Jersey. I was just being a smart-assed, smug New Yorker. And at the age of 22, commuting to someplace like Union City did not sound very glamorous.

      Delete
  15. About thirty years ago I stopped speaking to a colleague for almost two years over something that had been said. Someone asked why I never spoke to her and then ask what it was she said that had caused such offense. I honestly couldn't remember and in questioning neither could she. Oh damn I think I just remembered what it was......

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Willym:
      I work really hard to let go of past hurts (the story about the peacock feathers is just funny for me). My mother held grudges her entire life -- even on behalf of HER mother. And she NEVER forgot what annoyed her.

      Delete

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